O-Chem Nightmare

Had my first OChem Exam today. It was a sleepy nightmare. I recognized it all. It was easier than what I was expecting. But I hadn’t slept so my brain was fried.

Yes, it’s me, Priya. The one who swears over and over again she won’t stay up all night. She never went to bed again last night.

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Final final tomorrow

This hasn’t been a slam dunk semester. I took my Chem 102 final exam this morning. I did that stupid thing where I stayed up all night long (rested for an hour), but it was okay. I couldn’t think of the symbol for mercury (Hg), and that’s embarrassing.

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The Yuckness

I’ve been feeling very anxious lately about all the stuff that’s upcoming: standardized exams, quizzes, finals, etc.  My eyelid started twitching, and I can’t seem to will it to stop. I started having some panic attacks, even on days where there weren’t exams.

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Bad (idea) study habits

I can’t remember if I’ve written about my bad habits before, but I certainly haven’t improved. Part 1 of my second big Chem Exam of the semester was this morning (conceptual stuff on acids and bases and aqueous ionic solutions), and I did what I always so the night before the exam. I stay up all night and get frazzled.

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Blah-iology Lab Exam 1

So far this week, I’ve had a quiz for Chemistry lab and an exam in Biology Lab. I have a quiz for Chemistry lecture tomorrow morning.

My Bio Lab Exam was blah. I actually went to bed at 3 am early this morning and semi-slept/rested until 8:30-ish a.m. I made flashcards online, practiced them, and added to reference note sheets.

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Taking a tumble

Some days, I suffer from anxiety. There’s a voice in my head that reminds me that I am 30, that I am a part-time student at a community college (even though I strongly believe in the value of our local community college), and that I wasted my college years and my parents’ money because I was too lazy and sheltered to grow up. I interviewed for jobs only at fancy consulting firms and offices where all the young women dressed beautifully and seemed so smart, so much better than most other women. I tried to forget that I was raised middle class, that we only lived in the town we did because it was literally the edge of being included in the state’s best school district, and that the American meritocracy doesn’t exist. Many of my peers got jobs at fancy places because their parents got them the jobs. My parents pleaded with me to figure out what I wanted to do, and I backed away and they dropped the issue.

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Hindsight

I’ve been a little stressed lately. And I think, by not being totally honest with myself about it and not having stayed strong emotionally, I sort of screwed up. I’ll try to explain what happened.

Last Monday, my Chem prof decided to schedule  a chapter test covering 4 chapters for this Monday. Inside, I freaked. I sorted of freaked out at her, too, and told her, “I have a huge exam in Microbiology that same day. I don’t think I can do both.”

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Midsemester microbiology malaise

I’ve made it so far into the semester, and I had a frustrating episode with my Microbiology professor last week that’s made me feel…well, both irritated and genuinely apologetic.

He can be very condescending, which is weird, seeing as he’s taught this class for a long time and you’d think he wouldn’t be so sarcastic with us all the time, or with me, specifically, because I’m an adult and I don’t appreciate it. Of course, snapping at him didn’t make me seem adult, but it’s the middle of the semester, I’m getting an A- so far, and I’m always prepared (even if he thinks I ask dumb questions), so I feel entitled to being treated especially nicely, simply because I try.

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Faring my recent exams

So last time I posted (last Wednesday), I felt ill after my Microbiology Lab Practical. I’d stayed up all night studying for it, was exhausted, and dreaded my results. I received my results shortly before Chemistry that evening. Read the rest of this entry »

A tired October

I just took my first Microbiology Lab Practical. And I feel ill.

Not that I think I bombed it. No, I feel ill because I feverishly made flashcards yesterday. I’ve been trying to figure out how to study best for these things, what to expect, etc., and I overprepare and underperform. I’m attracted to complicated information that comes in handy maybe 1/50 questions.

I slept about 2 hours last night because a perfect exam in Microbiology is my white whale. I saw that on the first exam, two people scored perfect papers. I didn’t. I got a low B. The average was a low C. Read the rest of this entry »

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