Accepted!

I got accepted Early Decision to my state school’s pharmacy school. Yay! This is what I wanted all along.

I wish I could have blogged more, but last summer was emotionally painful. I want to be stronger. I thought I was, but I think my support network sort of fell apart. And, luckily, those that remained unknowingly really helped me a lot.

Getting through pharmacy school is going to take a lot of tenacity and a stronger belief in myself. It’s going to take even more discipline.

I want this, so I’m going to do everything I can in my power to become stronger and healthier, physically and mentally. My first step is to get physically stronger–lose the weight I gained this year after being on my allergy pills, strengthen my back and core muscles, tying up my crazy huge bunion and go running.

This summer, I promised myself I’d take better care of myself. I generally do, but I want to amp it up a lot.

So getting accepted to pharmacy school is the first of a lot of things I want to accomplish. I’m happy. Now step 2 is to build my mental and physical stamina, and an even better discipline.

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Planning, Scheming, Plotting

I keeping wondering what exactly went wrong last semester. I suppose it’s useless. I thought my OChem prof was disorganized and he made too many mistakes for me to feel comfortable.

And that was all there was to that.

This semester, I hope will be different. I’m taking all my classes at the Ji campus. I’m feeling slightly nervous. My Mondays and Tuesday will be hectic. It will get less hectic as the week goes on.

I’m preparing by studying OChem through the David Klein book. I’ve ordered Le Pens (tiny 0.3mm colored pens that I hope will be good for notetaking and drawing). I need to clean up my desktop.  I need to clean my backpack. Tomorrow I volunteer (and I have to figure out what’s a good new day to volunteer).

I need to finish listening to Scott Young’s videos, too. There’s quite a lot to do.

Flaky flake

I haven’t been doing as well as I’ve wanted to in OChem, and this is killing some of my motivation.

Fact: I did not take my multiv Friday night, so I was tired and sluggish on Saturday, and spent most of the morning and afternoon in bed reading about Gaddhafi’s death and then about Koko the gorilla. I wasted Friday afternoon, too.  Instead of being efficient, I was puttering around. I felt tired. I generally feel tired.

Maybe I need more iron. Sigh. I have a quiz tomorrow, and, historically, quizzes have not gone very well. It really kills my self-confidence and studying is about building self-confidence.

So I should be stricter with myself. I have trouble with discipline. I know exercise would help. Yet I feel like sticking it out in my chair trying to dredge up motivation is the answer.

I wonder if I’m trying to sabotage myself. I don’t want to be anything but reliable and steady, yet I get flaky.

Is it me? (Yup.)

I never intended to make this blog a confessional. I do like to track when I screw up and how I can improve myself, but I think what I’m about to say comes more from a place that feels guilty.

So last week, I busted my hump over Exam I in Organic Chem. I got an 88% (my lab partner got a near perfect score, which I am jealous of (and I vow to be a better student than her)). I dropped Physics recently.

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Want to be the girl with the most cake….

Our first organic chemistry exam is coming up on Monday. I’m nervous. I have not been doing well so far.

I think part of it is that I’ve been stressed. There’s been so much going on. And perhaps this sounds exceptionally silly, but I didn’t exactly realize I’d signed up for 12 credits. I considered Public Speaking a blow-off class, but the truth is, it has tests and stuff that’s due regularly.

I dropped Physics because I made a list of schools I wanted to go to, and I realized that a lot of them didn’t really even require physics or required only 1 semester, or they just need you to be done with both parts by the end of Summer 2012. So I can take the first part next semester instead.

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School begins

School begins tomorrow. I have 21 days until the PCAT. We voluntarily evacuated during the weekend because of Hurricane Irene. We were lucky to come back to an apartment with power on and clean water. The weekend in central Virginia was nice. We avoided all rednecks and had a lovely time.

I’ve had this problem lately where I don’t want to leave my apartment. I don’t love where I live, I have limited funds anyway, and driving to get everywhere is often a hassle. This all changes tomorrow, when I have to start my first day of school.

This year we have:

  1. O-Chem
  2. Physics
  3. Public Speaking
I have to mark down which dates applications are due. I feel so-so about so many of my schools. I don’t want to leave pharmacy school with six figures in debt. I badly want to get into my state university. I want to get my fierce competitive feeling back. I want to get my energy back. I sort of let the summer roll by.
I need to get my head on straight and work hard for the next 3 weeks. I have everything I need to do great. I just need to be confident. And I need to quit pretending that organizing will help me more. I’ve organized everything like crazy. it’s time to act and stop using “needing to get organized” as a crutch.

Little accomplishments

I am tired of thinking I’m not getting anything done. So I’m going to see what I am spending my day on, and I’m also going to add a list of things that I let myself get distracted by:
CHORES:
  1. Washed dishes
  2. Cleaned bathroom sink
  3. Posted Netflix
  4. Made To Do lists
  5. Wiped mirror in LVGRM
  6. Got packages from downstairs
  7. Put rest of Diet Cokes in fridge
General Organization & Grooming
  1. X’d out days in new desk calendar
  2. Wrote up countdown to PCAT and major dates
  3. Brushed my hair
  4. Washed my face, toned, moisturized
PharmCAS:
  1. Sent prof info (resume, personal statement, bullet points) needed for him to write recommendation letter
  2. Registered prof’s name with PharmCAS
  3. Asked dept chair/pre-health advisor for recommendation letter
  4. Sent personal statement to friend for criticism
PCAT 
  1. Oh crap.

How lazy can I be today? Let me count the ways!

You know what’s better than reviewing Quant? I’ll make you a list:

  1. Changing my WordPress theme
  2. Seeing Lauren Conrad take MTV Cribs on a tour of her parents’ megamansion
  3. Designing a new blog for myself so I can kick my own ass about stuff outside of school
  4. Watching an episode of “Dance Moms” and feeling like I wanted to shower after the experience.
  5. Making licorice tea to settle my stomach Read the rest of this entry »

31 Days Until A Brand New Me

Since the July PCAT, I have:

  1. Written my PharmCAS essay
  2. Secured 2 out of 4 recommendation letters
  3. Scheduled an interview with the hospital volunteer coordinator
  4. Gotten 2/3 of my transcripts in to PharmCAS (U of C better step it up. I didn’t pay $15 to let them send it at their leisure.)
  5. Started to add schools outside of my top choice to my list.
  6. Selected what kind of pharmacist I want to be
  7. Made a plan for the Sept. PCAT
  8. Built a daily study schedule up to test day Read the rest of this entry »

Summer of PCAT

Got an A in Chem 102 and an A in the second half of biology. It was a relief. I barely made an A in the second half of bio, to be truthful. I was not happy with my final lecture exam score, but I attribute that to having studied far more intensely for the cumulative chemistry final.

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